Courage
by Scribbler A
Summary: What if Shinji Ikari had dared to reach out?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer :** Not now, not ever, and Hideaki Anno is **not** my friend, nor is Gainax my father's company, so there.

**A/N :** I am back! Haha! Well, now that's out of my system, for those who are new to my work, hello! And for those old friends out there, this is probably the reason why I didn't touch 'In Between Bliss and Angst' for a while, so sorry 'bout that. About this story, I've planned to make it a one-shot at first, but then I've decided against it, and split it into around three to four chapters, and I will update it daily, so don't worry! So, nothing more to say, enjoy!

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Shinji was tired; beyond tired that he simply didn't care about changing into his sleepwear when he plopped down onto the futon in the living room with his SDAT player in hand.

His day was, in short, hectic but boring. He and Asuka had been training relentlessly for days with the damned dancing machine to prepare for their battle against the seventh angel, Israfel.

Even though by now they had achieved almost perfect scores during their synchronized dances for most of the times, he had still managed to make mistakes from time to time due to his lack of stamina, earning him a quick but hard hit to the head by a very ticked off Asuka.

Shinji turned to his left while absent-mindedly massaging the spot where Asuka had hit him during the times he had messed up. Frankly, he had lost count as to how many times she had hit him on the head throughout the entire training session. It wouldn't be such a surprise if were to say that he was suddenly diagnosed with a concussion.

He sighed, inserted the ear-buds into his ears and turned on his SDAT player. Thinking too much before sleeping was never a good idea, and sleeping was what Shinji really needed before the coming angel battle.

He gave the quite spacious room one last look, and was reminded of the fact that Misato was still at NERV, most probably staying up all night trying to improvise on a plan to make sure that everything goes right, and won't be back for the rest of the night.

As such, Asuka had taken the chance to slip away and sleep in Misato's room tonight, leaving Shinji alone in the living room. Not that he minded, though.

He lied in his make-shift for some time, listening to his SDAT player, sleep starting to claim the boy until the sound of footsteps coming from the hallway jolted him awake.

He pried open one eye to take a peek at the source of the sound, only to find a certain German redhead walking past him and into the kitchen.

"A-Asuka?" Shinji whispered as he watched in mild confusion.

'It feels like something's not right,' he thought. 'Why is she going into the kitchen at this time of the night?'

"Asuka?" Shinji tried calling out to the girl, and waited for a response from the kitchen, to which none came.

Disappointed, he waited patiently for the girl to step out of there. After a while, she did, albeit being a little wobbly, like how a drunkard walks, which was weird considering this was Asuka he was talking about.

With the faint lighting in the room, Shinji could barely make out her eyelids that were still securely shut even though she was still on her feet. '_Sleepwalking?_' He raised an eyebrow.

She moved around, each unbalanced steps threatening to bring her down onto the hard and cold floor, until reaching the edge of Shinji's futon and plopped down beside him, snuggling into Shinji's back in the process.

His body went rigid, his face turning scarlet from the level of contact he received, and the hows and whys nudging him in the back of his mind. He knew that Asuka was sleepwalking and was unintentionally doing whatever she was doing, but Shinji couldn't help but feel bewildered at her actions.

She's so...different when she's actually asleep and not yelling or bitching at things,' Shinji mused. 'Perhaps, she could sleepwalk to my bed more often?'

His lips curved up slightly at the thought. In seconds, he snapped back to reality and frowned. 'This is **not** good,' he thought. 'If Asuka wakes up in the morning and see this, I won't even be able to live long enough to see the angel, much less fight it!'

The boy began his valiant attempt of trying to squirm out of the hands of the German girl, fearing the consequences if Asuka had suddenly woken up to see them in the same bed, but her grip was strong enough to hold him in place, as expected from someone who excels in hand-to-hand combat. In the end, he was pretty much unsuccessful bar the fact he had unknowingly turned to face the beautiful German girl.

That was when he noticed it up close, her facial features that he, on normal occasions, would try to ignore. Her soft and luscious pink lips that shone dimly in the dark, the beautiful crimson red hair draping over her like a second blanket, the smooth and perfectly shaped face which complimented the other facial features she possessed, along with her beautifully proportioned body that was the envy of every girl of her age.

Shinji's gaze couldn't help but linger a lot longer at her well-shaped curves. Sure, he had known that Asuka was a beautiful woman, but he had never paid any close attention to her. Now that he did though, he had found her to be extremely attractive to the eyes, irresistible even.

His eyes then focused on her lips. 'So soft...like a...marshmellow,' he began closing in on her. Being the coward that was Shinji Ikari, he had not expected himself to feel the urge to kiss Asuka while she was asleep, though his raging hormones certainly thought otherwise.

Shinji stopped half an inch in front of Asuka's face, his mind was a raging storm full of conflicting thoughts and emotions. He didn't know what was right or wrong anymore. Should he back away in case she wakes up to find what he was about to do, or man up and kiss her then suffer whatever consequences she had in store for him when she finds out what he did?

Either way, it will still be a death sentence for him. 'Might as well go for it,' he thought. Finally convincing himself to go with it, Shinji allowed his hormones to dominate his senses as he inched closer to kiss her.

However, he never did do it in time.

A straight line of crystalline liquid streaked down from the girl's face before Shinji's lips managed to reach hers. He heard slight whimpering as he slowly moved his face away from hers, his mind still trying to register the fact that the great Asuka Langley Soryu was crying in her sleep.

_"Mama...Don't leave me..."_ Asuka murmured.

Any desire to kiss her was gone now, replaced by an endless pit of guilt. What had he been thinking, trying to do such a thing to her? Even worse, the girl he tried to lay his hands on was Asuka, the girl he had secretly admired for her confidence and tenacity, something he didn't have no matter how hard he had tried.

Throughout the incident, Asuka's grip on him had managed to loosen, leaving him an opportunity to escape from her intimate bear-hug, which he gladly took it and slipped away to the corner of the living room.

The night was going to be long and agonizing for the young pilot.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer :** Nope, nope, and nope. Don't own Evangelion.

**A/N :** Nothing much to say this time. Enjoy~

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On the next day the mission went as planned, and the angel Israfel was destroyed without any major casualties, sans a few dozens of destroyed abodes. Misato stayed back at NERV to clean up the mess, and Asuka had ran off somewhere else after changing back into her casual clothes.

"I'm home," Shinji called out to no one in particular.

Receiving no response whatsoever as he had expected, he sighed and dragged his tired body into his room. He had tried connecting the dots from what Asuka had said yesterday, thus severely cutting down his time for sleeping.

He sat down in front of his desk, hands automatically reaching for his SDAT player once again, when he let out a troubled sigh.

"Was my guess correct?" He asked the dusty desk in front of him, and as he got no response in return, as expected, he continued mumbling to himself, "If I act on a false guess, I'd get punched in the gut or kicked in the groin, or both..." He shuddered at the thought; that was why he didn't like the little 'plan' he had in his mind, because of Asuka's violent behavior.

Shinji sighed for the third time of the day, deciding that he just wasn't in the mood to be listening to the selection of classical music in his SDAT player, and moved to the living room for some daytime television instead.

He flipped through channel after channel with the remote, every program broadcasted during the afternoon not piquing his interest, and he finally rested on a channel currently broadcasting a soap opera called 'La Desesperación' or something that was quite popular during the times before Second Impact was triggered, or so Asuka had told him once from when she had heard it from Kaji.

The young Ikari yawned and grunted, apparently bored at the show, but paid attention to the story nonetheless. The story was about a heroine who had a huge fight with the male protagonist that caused them to break up. After some time living their own respective lives and apart from each other, both of them realized that they missed and still loved each other, so they ended up meeting again, and their following conversation and the romance in that part of the show had somehow made the love-deprived young Ikari rethink about his plans.

Maybe he would really like to try it like in the movies, being romantic and cliché and stupid, just for once, even if it meant he would regret it afterwards.

It was when the clock struck 5 in the evening that Asuka had returned to the Soryu/Katsuragi/Ikari residence.

She walked through the living room, intending to get to the kitchen for a drink, when she stopped and noted that there was a certain dummkopf sleeping on the couch, not that she was conscious of how ridiculously 'stupid' his face looked when he was asleep.

Her eyes lingered a while on the sleeping pilot before she continued on to the refrigerator in the kitchen, grabbed a carton of orange juice, and slammed the door close, which seemed to have awoke the other pilot from his slumber.

"A-Asuka?" Shinji spoke out of surprise as he got up from the couch, and the redhead spun around to face him, and then sneered at him. Shinji flinched at the gaze before trying to strike another conversation with her, "I-I s-see you're back."

"Huh?! Isn't that obvious, you dummkopf!" The hot-tempered girl bellowed at him, making him cringe even more.

Both of them remained silent after that, with Shinji's head drooping down in shame, until Asuka decided to break the awkward silence by speaking first.

"So, why are you sleeping here, and not in your own room?" She asked half-heartedly.

"I-I was waiting for you." Shinji responded without a second thought, but regretted immediately. Was he too straightforward just now? He was telling the truth when he answered, though Asuka may not see it that way. He turned slowly to face the girl, ready to see another sneer or a scowl on her face, only to find her staring blankly at him.

"Waiting for me?" She whispered under her breath, but still loud enough for Shinji to pick up what she had just said.

"Why are you waiting for me?" The girl spoke in a louder voice now.

"U-Um...Y-You see..." Shinji stuttered, seemingly at a lost for what he was supposed to say to the girl before him. "Umm...How was your day?"

How was your day. How was your day? Shinji never asked unnecessary questions like that, there must be something he's hiding, Asuka concluded, and decided to reply him casually as to dig for more information for what he originally wanted to say.

"Kind of boring...Went to a few places, did a few things, all boring stuff." She answered as nonchalantly as possible.

"I-I see...Umm...Well, you see..."

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Shinji Ikari stared at the ceiling of his room, on his back his own bed -a futon-, and on his hand his SDAT player set to replay only 'Track 25' and 'Track 26'.

He couldn't believe he had really done it; He had really done it, now Asuka was likely to ignore him or laugh at him for the rest of his life.

Either choice doesn't sound all too pleasant to him.

After receiving a casual reply from Asuka in the evening, he had found an ounce of courage to tell her the words he was planning to say.

"I know I'm stupid and unreliable, not a tad bit like you at all, but I want to stay by your side, even after defeating all the Angels, even after leaving NERV. B-Because, I think we're actually the same on the inside, we're afraid of being alone. We're afraid that the people precious to us would abandon us. I promise I won't leave you, so can I stay with you...if it's possible?" That was what Shinji had said to the girl.

After that, Asuka had stared at him for a while, her facial expression as blank as paper, but he had thought he saw a twinge of sadness mixed in between. After that, the redhead had said that she was tired, and went into her room without giving him a proper answer; she didn't even come out of there for dinner.

Shinji's mind kept replaying the scene with Asuka in the evening in his head as he lied in his bed, confused at what he should do now, or what he should do to amend for his mistake, for saying things like that to Asuka.

Now that he had calmed down and think through it, he realized that he was really just being naive and stupid all along. Who would even say _yes_ when someone had said something like that to you?

'I really am stupid,' he buried his head into his pillow, trying to get the incident out of his head, when he heard a knock on his door.

**(TO BE CONTINUED)**

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So, reviews?

**Re-edit notes**** :** Sorry, I forgot to put a line up for the scene cut. Promise it won't happen again ^^


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimers :** Hey look, I saw Hideaki Anno walking off towards the Gainax company, and I'm not allowed to enter, that means I'm NOT Hideaki Anno and I do not own Gainax, so Evangelion is not mine.

**A/N**** :** Hey, guess what? This is the last chapter. I know the story's quite short, because it's intended to be a one-shot from the start, but some parts were just too boring and long that I decided to split the story into three separate chapters and get rid of the unneeded parts. Sorry to disappoint, but this little chappy is the last one for this story, but don't worry, because I have a surprise for you guys, soon enough. Enjoy~

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'Who is it?' Shinji glanced towards the direction of his door. 'Misato's not home for the night, so that leaves...'

Asuka. A shiver ran down his spine. What is she planning? Is she here to take revenge for surprising her with what he had said this evening? Is she sleepwalking again? Why is she knocking on his door then?

There was a lot of questions unanswered; a lot of questions that confuses him, but he pushed them to the back of his mind because now he needed to pretend to be sleeping, so that Asuka would at least leave him alone for the night.

He shifted in his bed and turned so that his back was facing the door and pretended to be asleep, when the door creaked open. Soft footsteps were heard, ones that were done to refrain someone else from waking up, which was unlike what Asuka would do in any circumstances.

He felt another shift in his bed, and soon after that he felt someone's back pressed against his, causing him to shudder at the contact. "A-Asuka?!" He tried to turn around to find out if it was really the girl beside him, but a slender arm blocked his body in mid-turn.

"Don't turn around, and keep quiet." A voice resembling the German redhead commanded and Shinji did what he was told.

They remained in the same position for a while five, both of them not really trying to strike a conversation, or rather Shinji was too afraid to do so unless he wanted to get hit again, until the young pilot felt the girl behind him taking a big breath, as if to brace herself for something that was about to happen.

"Shinji," she called out, not really expecting the boy to answer her, and continued. "I...did some thinking after what you have said this evening. I tried asking myself the same question. Am I afraid of being alone?

I'm...still not sure, but when there was no one around me, I felt hollow inside all of a sudden, like I've lost all my purpose of living, like I didn't have the need to pretend to be strong anymore. When you offered me your company...Even after all the things I've said and done to you, I was really happy, happy and scared... I was scared that you would hurt me like everybody else..." The girl stopped, her voice already starting to crack, tears threatening to burst free from her eyes, but she swallowed it down, trying to speak again.

"Anyway, what I'm trying to say here is...Do you really promise...to stay with me?" The redhead asked, now turning around to face the boy, and her head slightly feverish and her heart thumping rapidly from the answer she was expecting from the young Ikari.

"Of-Of course," Shinji turned to face her as well, and found Asuka actually smiling at him after hearing his reply. Marveled at her beauty under the moonlit room, the soft red hair flowing down to her waist, the rare soft upturn in her lips, ones that indicates happiness instead of arrogance, and he began to stutter again.

"I-I mean...I was the one who made that proposal in the first place... Of course, you would-I mean I would not- I mean..." He bit his tongue in the rush to explain, earning a giggle from Asuka sitting across him.

Her hands slowly reached out at the boy in front of her, gently caressing his cheeks as she smiled at him lovingly, her actions a polar opposite to the normal Asuka Langley Soryu, leaving the young Ikari slightly baffled, and unsure how to react to the sudden change.

"Come on, let's sleep already. We have school tomorrow," she ushered the boy to lie down beside her, and Shinji complied silently, still trying to get used to the new and reborn Asuka next to him, in his room, and sleeping beside him.

Sleep came late for the both of them, but when it came, it was peaceful and pleasant slumber, something they've never experienced in a long while, as they snuggled close together, arms intertwined around each other, as if to acknowledge one another's presence, and their heartbeats in sync, as if they have become one in mind and in spirit.

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Shinji awoke to the sound of his alarm clock, and as he got up and stretch lazily, the memories of last night's event came rushing back into his mind, like a flood or an earthquake that instantly shook him wide awake.

He began his frantic search around his futon, noting that there was no sign of red strands of hair on his bed, and that the bed sans the spot he slept on had lacked the warmth of a human body, he let out a sigh he didn't knew he was holding.

"Of course it was a dream..." The young pilot whispered into the air and rested his head on one of his arms, a sudden surge of bitterness overwhelming his senses. Was he disappointed that it wasn't real? He didn't know, but it wasn't time to be dwelling on that now, he had to get up and prepare breakfast before Asuka starts yelling at him again.

Asuka. His heart sank again, the same surge of sadness and disappointment resurfacing in the depth of his heart, but he ignored it and went to work.

Approximately an hour later, Shinji was done with the breakfast of the day –steamed salmon and fried eggs along with miso soup – as the two other occupants of the house seemed to have woken up.

Asuka was the first to enter the kitchen, followed by Misato, who went straight to the refrigerator, retrieved a can of beer, gulped in down in one go, and made a disgusting and annoying shriek that had turned into a ritual every morning. Nothing felt out-of-place, Shinji noted once again, except that Asuka didn't greet him with an overly smug face like she did every morning, but instead she **smiled** at him, the kind that was aimed to be nice and not to provoke someone.

'Just like last night's...Was it real?' Shinji began questioning himself again as he sat down, intending to enjoy the breakfast he made.

The entire meal commenced in an awkward silence, or at least it felt awkward to Shinji because Misato wasn't trying to tease him today, and Asuka wasn't lashing out at him either. As soon as the Major finished her breakfast, she stood up immediately and went for her room, with two curious pairs of eyes following her as her door clicked shut.

Not long afterwards, she came out, fully dressed in her NERV uniform and told the kids that she had an important meeting today and left without saying anything else. The two pilots were left alone in the kitchen, which made it bad for Shinji because he didn't know what to do. Strike up a conversation?

"Umm...So..." The male pilot started, fidgeting and unsure of what he should say, when the redhead German cut him off abruptly.

"Come on lover boy, get the dishes washed up and let's go to school together already." She had **smiled** at him again while saying that, the same kind that wasn't used to provoke someone, which puzzled Shinji even more.

So, he took the chance while washing the dishes to ask the girl sitting at the table across him once and for all, if the event had really occurred yesterday, and if it was real.

"Asuka."

"Hmm?"

"Did I...promise you something very important yesterday?"

There was a pause, and Shinji began to fidget again while waiting for her response.

"Yes you did, lover boy. Forgot about it already?"

The boy wheeled around immediately and stared at her, mouth agape.

"Wait, so it's real?!" He gasped, and Asuka raised an eyebrow at him, and then smiled a mischievous smile at him.

"From the looks of you, you probably thought it was a dream right?" She took a guess.

Seeing Shinji blush and lower his head in shame, the redhead knew she had hit the spot and decided to continue on, "Well then lover boy, let me repeat what you've promised me. You said you would never leave me no matter what, and that you wouldn't betray me, so don't think you can call off the promise you've just as you like it because I'll drag you back to my side no matter where you run." She stood up; the playful smile still plastered on her face, left the kitchen and headed for her own room.

Shinji stood there, the running tap and the dishes forgotten, and stared at where she had formally sat at, a small smile beginning to form on his face. 'It was real.' He kept repeating it in his mind, and the more he thought of it, the happier he was; happy at what he had done yesterday, happy that he didn't just change his mind halfway through the ordeal, happy that Asuka had finally opened up to him.

It was just a naïve plan, an idea full of wishful thinking that came into the mind of a fool in the heat of the moment, and the fool had gone along with it, and he got what he wished in return. Shinji's smile never faltered as he went back to cleaning the dishes, his mind already wandering to the days where he and Asuka would laugh and joke together like true friends or even more, where they would share their love together without any hesitation between them, where the happier days lie at, where they have a better future.

**(THE END)**

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So, reviews?


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